Saturday, June 16, 2012

A Birthday Letter to My Nugget


Oh Baby D... Seems like just yesterday your Daddy sat at the base of my hospital bed ready to catch our 6 lb. 7 oz. miracle. It was such an amazing day, after so much worry over the whole nine months you proved to us time and time again that you were different, that you were going to be just fine, and that you would do things your way. And you did just that, on your terms without intervention, you made your debut into our family and have changed my life forever.

I had no idea how I would be able to be a mom to two, two boys nonetheless, I was afraid that I wouldn't rise to the occasion. I had no idea what my future held with the arrival of your precious little feet and toes and eyes and smile. Little man I can't tell you how much you have changed me in the short 12 months that you have been here. You have been the complete opposite of your brother in so many ways, I've had to relearn what it is to be a Mom again. To be a Mom to you, the one you need and deserve. You have taught me to let go and realize that I am not in control all of the time. I've learned to let you be yourself, the baby boy you were intended to be, to let my guard down and to not be so rigid. You have tested me in every way possible, emotionally, physically, and after 12 months I can say that I did it!! I think you knew that I needed to be challenged so that I could realize that I am stronger than I thought.

You most certainly have a purpose in my life outside of being a most amazing son, you came around during a time that has brought a lot pain and saddness and through it all you have been my shining light. You came into this world just as your Great Uncle lost his fight and returned to heaven and shortly after we found out that your Grampa is very sick. I know you were sent here to help us all through this. Nugget you make me smile through the tears, you remind me that there is joy all around. You are a very special little boy with a special mission and I'm so glad that I get to be your Mom. I can't wait to watch and see the man you become. To watch you move mountains.... because you will.

Thank you for being my tiny little knight in shining armour, I never knew how much I needed you until you were here. I can't picture my life without you and your smile and your beautiful blue eyes. The past 12 months have been the hardest most amazing months of my life. I wouldn't change one single day, not even the 8 months of sleepless nights, because you are you and I love every ounce of what you are. I love you with all that am and all that I will ever be, Nugget.

Sweet Dreams Little Man... tomorrow you awake to a whole new world... and lots of birthday kisses from your momma ;)

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