Monday, November 30, 2009

Don't Blink.... you don't want to miss a thing...

But children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow

So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.

I'm rocking my baby. Babies don't keep.

~Ruth Hulburt Hamilton

Stollen from another new mommy and brought me to tears remembering to cherish these days as they won't last forever, no matter how many bad days we have, this is my vow to cherish them all! Read more!

Getting through it...

So it's been a rough few weeks here at the Farrell house... we've been dealing with all kinds of issues from gas and formula switches, to fussiness and sleepless nights, to breastfeeding hell and post partum depression. So I apologize for the lack of posts but know that I am jotting down all of my experiences and when I have the time I'll outline it for everyone, the good the bad and the ugly! What can I say this motherhood thing is no piece of cake but I'm getting through it, one. step. at. a. time... Read more!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Holden 2 weeks 5 days old....

Our DIY newborn photos.... just shy of his actual due date....

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Tuesday, November 10, 2009

They don’t call it labor for nothing! My little guy's long birth story!

We headed into the hospital at 7:00 pm to start the induction. First we were settled into our room which I must say was like a luxury hotel suite, it was HUGE! Talk about plush, there was a pull out sofa for dad to sleep on, zero gravity recliners for other visitors, a flat screen tv with games, educational videos and movies on demand, the free room service menu including things like jumbo sea scallops, lamb top sirloin, and pork medallions, I mean even the bathroom was plush complete with hair dryer, and decorative curtain valance for the tub! After taking pictures of all of the “amenities” we got ready for a night of interventions. I was checked and the games began with me at a fingertip dilated and 60% effaced. I was given Prostin, similar to Cervidil, every 4 hours to help ripen the cervix and then we waited until the morning to see what the game plan would be.

My body actually started laboring on it’s own after 2 doses of the Prostin but we went ahead with another dose because it would just further things along. Once the doctor came in the following morning we started the Pitocin. I was now at 1 cm and 75% effaced and the plan was to break my water at noon. In the meantime, the contractions started coming full force and getting pretty painful. Everything that people said about Pit was true, at least I think so since I’ve never done this before! It became painful quickly that’s all I know… At this point, I didn’t want to get the epidural yet because I didn’t want it to slow things down and I didn’t want to be tied to my bed that early. I held out for a couple more hours and then asked for some IV pain meds to tide me over. I was given Stadol which worked great to knock out the pain but the OB came in 30 minutes later to break my water and she decided to crank the Pitocin at the same time so it was a double whammy. And ladies and gentlemen buckle your seatbelts! The contractions immediately became completely out of control every 2 minutes at most, I was soon shaking from the pain and I was begging for the epidural. The nurse told me that they’d rather I wait it out a little bit longer until there was some progress with my cervix, because I was still at 1-2 cm and 75% effaced, so I attempted to hold out for longer. I made it one hour until I was absolutely spent and told the nurse that I didn’t care anymore I needed meds and I needed them NOW!

About 30 minutes later they came in to do the epidural which was a piece of cake. After dealing with those contractions a little needle stick was nothing to fear! It felt similar to getting a tattoo for just a few seconds and the needle was in and out. I was doing my best to keep it together because I was still getting contractions every 2 minutes and shaking uncontrollably through them. At last the catheter was placed and I was anxious for the relief. Unfortunately, I ended up being one of the lucky people whose epi doesn’t work like planned. It only took on one half of my body. GREAT! They tried tipping me over to one side and ultimately replaced the catheter to attempt to get it positioned correctly but it never worked. The only solution was to crank the meds up to where it relieved pain on the side it wasn’t working fully but this made the other side 100% numb to where I couldn’t even lift my leg. The pain was manageable at this point, I could deal with only feeling the pain on one side and I was more comfortable for about another hour or two. Once the epidural was placed Shaun ended up going to run some errands since it looked like I was going to be here for quite some time, afterall I had only dilated 1 full cm since we came into the hospital! But it seemed that as soon as he left the pain returned on that one side with avengence! I started shaking again and called for the nurse to bring the anesthesiologist back in to do something. But the nurse sent her to the wrong room so it took an HOUR for her to come in and fix me. In this hour I was dying! I was sooo nauseous they ended up giving me Zofran to keep me from puking and finally the lady came in to fix the meds. She cranked up the epidural, gave me another bolus, and a shot of Fentanyl which took the edge off one more time. The nurse checked me after this and all of a sudden I was 6-7 cm! I scrambled to get a hold of Shaun and tell him to get back to the hospital quickly! The shaking continued and the nurses said I was transitioning and started preparing the baby bassinette area. Shortly after Shaun showed up I was checked again, now at 8-9 cm 100 % effaced and baby was “right there”. The doctor went to get changed and it was time to push once she returned. Holy cow that was fast!

Pushing was overall very painful because the meds and epi started to wear off once again, so I pretty much felt everything on my left side. We ran into some issues with the baby’s heart rate during the contractions which apparently happens more frequently in babies that are small. His heart rate would drop to the 50’s (normal is 140 bpm) during contractions and the doctor told us after about 3 pushes that we may need to use a vacuum to get him out because it wasn’t safe to have his heart rate continue dropping this way for a long time. So this was my motivation to push like a maniac. I was told that I pushed amazing for a first timer but honestly I didn’t feel like I was accomplishing anything. I kept thinking if I’m pushing so great then why isn’t he out! But I kept on going… it seemed like I was there for 7 hours just pushing. I was getting exhausted and I was still shaking uncontrollably from the pain. I was on the oxygen mask and it all just became very overwhelming. I just couldn’t seem to get him under my pelvic bone so he would come out and then slide back and come out and slide back no matter what I did. We then started pushing 4 times per contraction instead of 3 and I just didn’t have anything left. I told her I had one more good set of pushes in me so she got the vacuum ready just to help him under the pelvic bone and I gave it my all. 4 pushes later he was out thank GOD!! As soon as he was out I felt a burning sensation and asked frantically if I had torn, Shaun looked at me and said “babe she had to cut you”. I guess the vacuum popped off of his head as he was almost out and he started sliding back in and she grabbed the scissors, cut me, and grabbed his head. I got a last minute/emergency episiotomy to top it all off!!

Holden Liam was born at 8:32 pm November 5th after just less than an hour of pushing. Our little guy weighed in at 5 lbs 3 oz and 18 3/4 inches long. He was staring all around the room from the moment he came out of the womb, eyes wide open, very alert. He was taken to the nursery to be suctioned soon after because he had some fluid in his lungs, but he was back in the room with us about an hour later and has been doing fantastic ever since! He is absolutely precious and already looks like a little man, not your typical newborn. It is truly amazing that he came out of me, I just can’t wrap my head around it…. Our beautiful baby boy is finally here and he was worth every second of discomfort these past 9 months and every minute of my crazy labor! I am amazed at myself for doing it, I actually did this… he is here… I just can’t believe it, he is here at last!! Read more!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

36 weeks: All coming to an end…

(In my Halloween costume... 36 weeks!)

What a rollercoaster this experience has been. Aside from the normal ups and downs of pregnancy I feel like with all of the extra little issues we’ve had I haven’t been able to catch my breath in 9 months… I will breathe a huge sigh of relief when my precious son enters this world and I can finally look into his eyes and know that he is here and he is ok. And what a surreal feeling to look down and say, I did this, I made him, I grew him inside of me, I nourished him, sacrificed for him, and he’s here… after all of this, he is here.

So this is my last week of being pregnant and that is a weird thought! 9 months is a long time! You almost adapt to this new way of living only to be tossed upside down again when it’s time to deliver. I have really starting getting used to the aches and pains, tiredness and clumsiness, shortness of breath, and trouble moving around.

It is also our last week of being “non parents” we are kid free for 7 more days. I got out of my car yesterday while running errands and it was a blizzard outside. It occurred to me as I went running into the store that it was going to be so different now that I will have to buckle and unbuckle the baby now every time that I get out of the car! It’s going to be a much more complicated process and a lot harder in the snow. Little things like that are about to be so different, so we will be doing our best to celebrate and enjoy each other and our kidless freedom in the next week.

And the induction date has arrived…
We were surprised to learn that our induction date has been moved up and so this will be my last pregnant post! Tonight we head in to get things going and I should be holding my son tomorrow. I had a nervous breakdown last night after learning that this was it… I went through every emotion possible and bawled my eyes out most of the night. My thoughts ranged from what the heck did we get ourselves into, we’re not ready for this, to I’m going to be a MOM, and just pure elation. I feel like I’m schizophrenic and I go from crying to laughing in a split second.

I had not planned on going in for the induction yet, we were supposed to have one more day to wrap things up, one more day to spend time together, see a movie, clean the house, a million things on the to-do list. And now we’ve been ambushed… we are going in tonight!

Driving home with my hubby last night was the hardest thing I’ve done so far, we sat there in silence together pondering what is about to happen. A chapter of our lives together is over tomorrow and another chapter begins. He kept looking over at me smiling and wiping my tears, neither one of us knowing how to process what was going on. We had a snuggle fest in the bed last night, our last night of being the only way we know how to be. We cuddled with the dogs in the bed and held each other close. Our last night of good sleep, our last night of being just the two of us… we cried and talked and shared our excitement and fears. And dozed off together for the very last time as a family of two… tonight we go in to meet our son… after all of this time we will be holding him in our arms… Read more!

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Utterly Yours Pregnancy Pillow Review

I had the privilege of trying out this pregnancy pillow and I was excited to find something to help relieve all of the aches and pains that make sleeping nearly impossible these days! This little pillow is really cute and I like how compact it was, easy to tote around unlike a lot of the other types out there. It comes in a little square package with an attractive pattern and color. Overall I think that this wedge type pillow is a good option for sleeping problems during pregnancy. It props your back up so that you can easily stay on your side and it supports underneath the belly keeping your spine from twisting awkwardly. I really liked the memory foam in the belly side, it sucks up nicely to your stomach! I would say that it solves a good majority of the back issues from sleeping but I wish that it was larger because I found myself using more pillows along with it to get completely comfortable. The only other issue that it doesn’t tackle is the hip pain, you still have to put a pillow between your legs to keep the hips from aching. In this regard the larger and bulkier pillows may solve the discomforts better but you also have to deal with their bulkiness. So depending on how uncomfortable you are at this stage in your pregnancy there are a million options to ease your pain. I’d recommend the Utterly Yours pillow but be aware that you’ll need to rig a few other pillows with it if you have every ache and pain that I seem to have! Happy sleeping…

Get your very own at
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